I saw you talking to her.
You were making her happy--
You didn’t know I was watching. Please
do not refuse this to say I’m overreacting.
In the past you gave a banquet just for me
inviting everyone I ever knew,
even Shirley Temple was there.
You thought of everything. I didn’t lift a finger.
You had the broccoli and cauliflower shimmering
on each plate with a single slice of bread perfectly
designed with its spread
and more of everything in the kitchen.
Didn’t you know it was never that I wanted?
I wanted to take you in my arms and love you to death.
I woke up hungry from that dinner. And now there is the future,
no denying it. I saw it distinctly in my bad dream.
I was on a trip lost in work writing on a cliff,
seven miles away from anyone and you were at home
with your new heart – and for this nightmare there is no defense.